(With Professional Cleaning Tips That Actually Work)
Some people clean because they enjoy it, and honestly, good for them. The rest of us clean because something has reached a level of filth that can no longer be ignored, or because we have Googled “how to clean a microwave” at 11pm and realised we have hit rock bottom. Cleaning is not always about motivation. Sometimes it is about survival, and sometimes it is about pretending to be a functioning adult for long enough to get through the week.
Urban Clean does not clean houses (sorry) but the good news is that you can absolutely be lazy and still get results. We do not believe in gatekeeping, so we have included the professional cleaning tips to back it all up. Below are the cleaning tasks people are Googling the most right now, and yes, these are real, paired with the laziest possible method and the professional version that actually works.
How to Clean a Microwave Without Actually Cleaning It
People search this constantly because microwaves are tiny crime scenes that quietly accumulate the worst parts of human behaviour. They are where leftovers explode, sauces splatter and mystery smells develop over time. Most people open the door, see the chaos inside and immediately close it again with the emotional resilience of someone who has seen too much. It is a universal moment of denial.
The Lazy Method
Put a bowl of water inside, microwave it until it boils, open the door, stare at the steam like it is doing the work for you, wipe vaguely, close the door and walk away feeling like you have achieved something.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Steam helps loosen grime, but you still need to wipe properly. A microfibre cloth and a mild detergent will remove the splatter you have been pretending not to see. It takes twenty seconds and your microwave will no longer smell like a combination of curry, bad choices and last week’s reheated pasta.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a week. Real humans clean it when something explodes.
The Lazy Shower Clean, Also Known as Spray and Pray
Soap scum is one of the most searched cleaning problems because it builds up slowly and then suddenly becomes a textured wall installation that looks like it belongs in the museum of poor life choices. Showers are the perfect storm of humidity, product residue and denial, which is why so many people resort to the spray and pray method. You spray cleaner everywhere, walk away, hope gravity does something and then return later to discover that absolutely nothing has changed.
The Lazy Method
Spray the entire shower, walk away, forget you sprayed it, return hours later and pretend the product did something. Spoiler: it didn’t.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Letting the product sit is correct because dwell time matters, but you still need to scrub. A soft brush and a vinegar solution work well, and proper ventilation helps prevent mould from turning your bathroom into a biology experiment. It is still quick, still easy and still lazy friendly, just more effective.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a week. Most people clean it when the tiles start to feel textured.
How to Clean a Washing Machine (The Irony)
People search this constantly because the washing machine is the one appliance we all assume is self cleaning, even though it absolutely is not. Over time it becomes a damp, smelly cave filled with detergent residue, fabric softener sludge and whatever mysterious particles fall off your clothes during the week. The lazy method is to run a hot cycle and pretend that fixed everything.
The Lazy Method
Run the hottest cycle available and assume the machine has healed itself emotionally and physically.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Wipe the seals, clean the detergent drawer and run a vinegar cycle to remove mould, smells and the mysterious sludge that accumulates in places you did not know existed. It prevents the mystery of why your clothes still smell strange and keeps your machine from becoming a damp, smelly cave.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a month. Most people clean it when it starts to smell weird.
The Fastest Way to Clean a House When You Want It to Look Like You Tried
This is one of the most searched cleaning questions because everyone has had a day where the house looks like a tornado passed through and yet you only have the energy to do the bare minimum. The lazy method is the classic visible bits only speed clean. You swipe the benches, shove clutter in a drawer, vacuum the middle of the floor and pretend the corners do not exist.
The Lazy Method
Clean only what guests will see and ignore everything else.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
A top down approach is genuinely faster. Start with fans and high surfaces, then benches, then floors. Keep a cleaning caddy so you are not wandering the house like a confused side character in a video game looking for supplies. It is efficient, simple and makes you look far more competent than you feel.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says daily (really). Real humans do this when someone texts that they are dropping by.
How to Clean Glass Without Streaks or Using Your Sleeve
Streak free glass is a top search because everyone has tried to clean a window and ended up with a smeary, cloudy mess that looks worse than when they started. Most people resort to using their sleeve, which is fast and convenient but also deeply ineffective.
The Lazy Method
Use your sleeve, pretend it worked and move on with your life.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Vinegar and warm water, or your favourite glass cleaner, paired with a microfibre cloth, is the best combination for streak‑free glass. Work from top to bottom in an S motion. Avoid cleaning in direct sunlight because that is what causes streaks. It is simple, quick and stress free, which leaves the rest of the day for watching Stranger Things again and staring blankly into the fridge.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a week. Most people clean glass when they can no longer see through it.
How to Clean an Oven Without Crying
Oven cleaning is one of the hardest and most searched tasks because ovens are where hope goes to die. They collect burnt cheese, spilled sauces and the ghosts of meals past, all baked into a crust that feels personally offensive. The lazy method is to close the door and emotionally detach.
The Lazy Method
Close the door and pretend the inside of the oven is not your problem.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Dish soap, vinegar and ten minutes of dwell time are your best friends. Remove the racks, wipe properly and avoid harsh abrasives that damage the surface. It is not glamorous, but it is far less traumatic than the alternative and it will not leave your oven smoking like a nightclub from the nineties.
Bonus Tip: The Secret Oven Door Trick Most people don’t know this, but many (not all) oven doors have a hidden latch on both sides near the top that lets you detach the second pane of glass. Yes. You can actually clean between the glass. It slides out like a magic trick and suddenly all those mysterious streaks you thought were permanent can be cleaned.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says every three months. Most people clean it when smoke starts coming out.
How to Clean Window Blinds, The Avoidance Olympics
People search this because blinds are dusty nightmares that no one wants to deal with. They collect dust in a way that feels almost like a personal affront, as if they are trying to shame you for not being a better person.
The Lazy Method
Swipe one slat, decide you have done enough and go lie on the couch. Some people take the blinds down and hose them outside like they’re pressure‑washing a car, which is unhinged behaviour, so I am of course in full support of this. I personally cannot take mine down without breaking them, so that method is off the table for me. Choose your fighter.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
A microfibre cloth or duster from top to bottom is the fastest method. For stains, a vinegar solution works well, and if you are feeling fancy, the tong and cloth hack is surprisingly effective.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a month. Real humans clean blinds when they are visibly furry.
How to Remove Mould When You Want To Do Literally Anything Else
Mould removal is a huge search trend because mould appears out of nowhere and immediately becomes everyone’s problem. It spreads quietly, thrives in humidity and makes you feel like you are living in a subplot from a horror movie, no matter how nice your place actually is.
The Lazy Method
Spray vinegar, walk away and hope the mould gets bored and leaves.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Vinegar can help with some surface mould, but it won’t deal with staining and it doesn’t work on every species. Commercial mould cleaners work faster because many contain bleach, but not everyone can use bleach safely, especially people with allergies, asthma or poor ventilation. If bleach is not an option, there are still alternatives. Oxygen‑based cleaners, hydrogen‑peroxide products and non‑bleach mould removers are commonly used because they’re gentler and don’t have the same strong fumes, and you can usually find them at Bunnings, Coles, Woolies or even Aldi when they do their cleaning Special Buys. No matter which product you choose, dwell time, scrubbing and ventilation are what actually make the difference, and keeping the area dry afterwards is what stops the mould from returning.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says weekly. Most people clean mould when it becomes a personality in the room.
How Often You Should Deep Clean According to Google
People search this because they want permission to avoid deep cleaning for as long as possible. Life gets busy, things pile up and suddenly you are wondering if you should clean because something smells strange or because a guest is coming over. That’s totally okay. Google is not the boss of you (keep telling yourself this).
The Lazy Method
Deep clean only when absolutely necessary, whether too late, too soon, when the planets align.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Every three months is ideal for general areas, and monthly for kitchens and bathrooms.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says every three months. Real humans deep clean when the guilt becomes unbearable.
How to Clean Those Horrible Stove Filters
Rangehood filters are the unsung villains of the kitchen. They sit quietly above your stove, collecting every greasy particle your cooking has ever produced, until one day you look up and realise they have become a sticky, dusty, metallic sponge of regret.
The Lazy Method
Take them out, look at them in horror, put them back in and pretend you did not see anything.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Soak them in very hot water with dish soap and laundry powder for twenty to thirty minutes, then scrub lightly and rinse.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a month. Real humans clean them once a year during a burst of guilt.
How to Clean Oven Racks Without Feeling Personally Victimised
Oven racks are heavy, awkward and covered in baked on grime that feels like a punishment for something you did in a past life.
The Lazy Method
Put them on the balcony and hope rain cleans them.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
Soak them in a bathtub with hot water and laundry powder or a dishwasher tablet for several hours, then scrub lightly. Or, if you’re feeling brave, wash them with dishwashing liquid and a wire scourer and scrub hard enough to burn a few hundred calories.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says every three months. Most people clean them when smoke becomes a problem.
How to Mop When You’d Rather Watch Lord of the Rings Again
Mopping is one of the most avoided cleaning tasks because it feels optional until the floor starts grabbing at your socks, and even then most people do a chaotic version that involves waving the mop in every direction, missing corners entirely and hoping the floor looks slightly less questionable when it dries.
The Lazy Method
Splash some cleaner into a bucket, dunk the mop, swipe it around the middle of the floor and hope the smell of detergent convinces you the job is done.
Cleaning Tip: How the Pros Actually Do It
A pH‑neutral floor cleaner is the safest choice for most surfaces. Warm water helps lift dirt, but the mop should always be wrung out so you’re not flooding the floor. Start by doing the edges first and cut right into the corners where grime settles. Once the perimeter is done, fill in the rest of the floor with smooth, consistent strokes that follow the natural grain. This prevents streaks, avoids patchiness and leaves the floor looking properly cleaned instead of “briefly damp”. And of course, there’s always that one person who walks across the floor the second you finish, even though you specifically said “give it a few minutes,” leaving you to decide whether to mop their footprints immediately or accept them as part of the home’s natural landscape.
How Often You Are Supposed To Clean It, According to Google
Google says once a week. Most people mop when something spills or when the floor starts making a sound.
The truth behind all these tiny cheats
The best part about these hacks is that they’re not really about cleaning at all, they’re about being human. They’re the shortcuts we take when life is full, the tiny acts of rebellion that get us through the week, and the quiet proof that everyone is just doing their best to keep things vaguely under control. A home doesn’t have to be perfect to feel good… it just needs a little humour, a little effort, and the occasional blanket thrown over a questionable situation. And while we don’t clean houses (sorry), we can make your office so clean it starts updating its own LinkedIn.
If You’re Tired of Chasing Cleaners, We’re Here
Reliable, consistent, high‑quality office cleaning that makes your workplace feel better the moment you walk in. Let us take it off your plate so you can get back to running your business. Click here to get started.
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